Reflections on turning Seventy One

Yesterday, July 4 I attained the ripe old age of 71. In truth I don't feel much different mentally than when I was 20. It's just that the old body starts to break down like an old Buick.
It brings to mind the old adage, " if I had known that I was going to live this long, I would have taken better care of myself."
Here are top 10 good things and the top 10 bad things about being an old guy in the modern world.

GOOD THINGS:

1. Senior coffee at McDonalds.
2. Can flirt with young girls as they just dismiss me as an old coot.
3. Can drive at 55 as have nowhere that I have to be any way.
4. No longer a slave to fashion (i.e., Can wear comfortable shoes & clothes.)
5. Can take a nap whenever I want.
6. Don't understand popular music, nor care to.
7. Food that I used to not care for is now delicious.
8. Get to wear my cap with the bill facing forward.
9. Artificial knee replacements.
10. Don't have to worry about gall stones as have no gall bladder.

BAD THINGS:

1. Decaf coffee.
2. My memory of how much things used to cost goes back further than most people.
3. All your friends are old people too.
4. Have to take a whole lotta' pills every day & I don't know what most of them are for.
5. My feet hurt, my back hurts, my knees hurt...everything hurts.
6. Don't understand popular music, nor care to.
7. Food that I used to like doesn't taste quite so good.
8. Insomnia.
9. Anti-insomnia i.e., fall asleep at inopportune moments during the day. Like in the middle of a movie or when talking to wife. (could be a good thing too)
10. Getting up to pee two or three times in the night.